my birthday

7 december
ok. I dunno where to begin.
I'll start from now. Right now, i'm crying, as i predicted around 4 days ago. Then, i felt like crap. I felt lonely and alone and pathetic...And well, like crap. I cried then too, thinking about how i'd be all alone on my 16th bday (ppl couldn't come thanx to the darling phy test- i tell u phy ruins lives...) and feel like shit and sorry for myself and cry.
Wee. I'm crying now. But because i've realised how loved i really am and what an ingrate i am to not realise it and thank god.
Sam and prachi and nripsuta turned up today at eleven-ish with a cake and eatables and the card. I was sitting on the bed, in PAJAMAS and with OILED HAIR and talking on the phone with mansi.
-_-;

Hey, I was going to take a bath when mansi called... :( ,don't blame me
i freaked out. And i was really happy. I ran to my room to change and sat on the bed for 5 minutes to come to terms with what happened. Then, after sam banged on the door, i finally changed and went outside to get a beard of chocolate (i turned into a man on my sixteenth birthday! Unfortunately, not from a boy, but a girl. Fortunately for 10 minutes only.)
we ate. We chatted. They confessed about their conspiracy. How they did it. The planning and the dodging me to get the card signed etc etc
and the card... Its AWESOME. I love it. Sam must have died making it. The amount of effort and detail and work made my heart melt. It also explained Divyanshu disappearing during the eng period when shreya (not ghobi, not dhobi, but section g wali) called him. We teased him all day about it, asking him why he went and talked to a girl whose name he doesn't even kno ("oh ho... FLIRTING!!!"). And seal signed it. He SIGNED NICELY!
The world is weird.
Then sam left *sniff*
then nripsuta's dad came and she had to go.
Prachi stayed till 2. We chatted. We discussed. We looked up phy derivations and even tried a phy experiment (a ring n a bead.Got a bead. Ok. Got a ring. Ok. Wait....Wtf, ring to be 2m long???).
After prachi left, i decided to read sam's letter thing. I'd saved it for last so i could read it aaram se and savor it.
A while later, when i was still reading it, mom walked into the room and just stood there cleaning up the table a bit and looking around. I really started getting irritated cause i was getting senti reading sam's letter and i wanted to be alone for a while. She asked me a few questions and i got more irritated on being interrupted and wished she would leave. I was going back to reading it, when i realised something. This is my mom. She bloody gave birth to me. She's the reason i'm alive and have a stupid birthday. Thus, birthdays should actually be about the kids and mothers. All the importance is given to the kid on the birthday and the mom is sort of forgotten in the celebration. She had been the biggest part of the whole thingy.
Dunno if you get what i mean.
Whatever, i felt like a sore asshole. I looked up to see mom walking out of the room. I ran after her and gave her a big large hug, and mentally slapped myself for ever being irritated with my mom. I then quickly walked into my room to hide my tears.
A few seconds later my mom yelled at me to go have my bath and i couldn't help but smile.

Just made me realise that there are so many things we're not thankful for.
Thanks mom, sam,chi, nripsuta, manvi, vani, shreeda, mansi, nayani, jismi, ankita etc etc.

i'm drunk right now

Hello ppl. I'm here to declare my ...er... undying love for adi cause i have nothing at all to do to entertain myself. You see, the Arse has been app ignoring me, and i've been doing the same to him, and didn't care until today when i went through my blog.

I miss him. :(

I miss his darling snappy comments. Me making fun of him in public. Insulting his ugly face and his son.
I didn't care till today. Now i realise pissing him off was so much fun and wonder why i didn't miss it before.
I'm a sadist, i know, but irritating him gave me infinite pleasure.
Even now, reading through his terribly mean comments, i can't help but laugh and smile at my witty comebacks and derive pleasure from the insults he recieved from me in the past.
Aw.
*sniff*

i miss u adi

can't u come and quarrel with me one last time. just for old times sake?

woohoo?

....So, i thought i'd lost my botany notebook and i went to the lost and found during the break between the coaching classes to search for it.
Manvi pulled on the handle of the door of the tiny lost and find room to realise that the door was locked from the inside.

We knocked.
We waited for five minutes.
We looked at each other.
We started laughing crazily.


Why? Well, imaging a REALLY tiny dark room. Put two guys in it. Add weird muffled noises. Close the door from inside. Add dirty minds.
What do you get?
Some really strange ideas.
As we waited we could hear weird muffled male voices. The door opened around 10 minutes later, and i couldn't help wondering why. And it was opened hz this guy, while another guy stood in a corner.

And yeah, i almost forgot...

The guy was buttoning his shirt as he opened the door.

Woohoo!
(you'll understand the double meaning if you play sims 2)

I think I saw blood

Pushpanjali died.
On 27th, wednesday.
Some time between 3:30- 4:30
I found out about the matter in the bus after coaching. Megh said it might be murder, which caused me to laugh. The general news was that a girl cut the grill of the room window and jumped. No one knew who it was, but everyone was guessing. I found out her name when prachi called me to talk about the matter. She heard about the matter on tv. I went to watch tv too and find out more when harshit called. He was the one who confirmed that she had jumped from the bathroom window after authog the grill (the news channels had been confusing me by making up stories of her falling of balconies). He also told me that she was in C. I was really happy that i didn't know her as i knew i'd be depressed if i did.
No one had a clue why she suicided. She got almost full marks in all subjects. She was damn intelligent. Apparently, she was stressed.
The whole atmosphere was tense in school the next day. There was an assembly for her. People who didn't know her came and said that she was a beautiful child (that was divya)
All the head boys and head girls and a couple of more appointees, and the reps, the warden, the CT and the vice princi's were forced to say something about her. Almost all ended their speech (2 liners) with 'may her soul rest in peace'. The line got on my nerves after the first 100 times.
Ppl from C cried that day. Ppl in my class who knew her (quite a few, as 90% of my class are hostelers), were depressed. I was in a bit of a sucky mood too. I found it hard to maintain my usual happy 4 no reason mood.

And of course, the matter about me and sam maybe having seen blood didn't exactly improve my mood.
On wed, after coaching, i and sam went to get ice cream from the OAT vala area. There we saw that the ice cream shop was closed, so we loitered around there only. Then, i saw this puddle of something red. It was dry and shiny, like the paint on metals. I thought it was paint, and went 'ooo, dekho, dekho, khoon!'
and sam was like, 'haan, lagta hai koi mar gaya...'
and we generally crapped around.
On thursday, when we went to that area again, there was no sign of the puddle having existed.
Creepy.

Getting Dreamy

I had a dream about a snake last night. A freaky, long, fat snake.
It freaked me out so i searched on the net about what it might mean. I found a couple of Dream dictionaries online so i searched a couple of things that i have dreamt about. The OR means that the next meaning is from another dream dictionary.


SNAKES
Snake represents hidden fears. Snakes can also symbolise the poisonous words and innuendo of the people around you.
OR
In some cultures, snakes are highly regarded and symbolize the ability to transcend into higher levels of consciousness or into areas of knowledge that exist outside perceived time and space.
Snakes emerging out of the ground may represent your unconscious or repressed materials coming to your conscious mind.
In the long run... The snake may be a positive symbol, it may represent difficulties that lead us to the center of personality and result in feeling of completeness.
OR
In Asian cultures, the snake is a symbol of wisdom in the form of earthly knowledge. If one dreams of snakes from this perspective, it is a dream of renewal, problem solving and good tidings in general.

Superstition- it was believed to see a lone snake and feel threatened by it in a dream means that you have a bad enemy that is working against you, it is also a warning against bodily harm from an enemy.


STORMS (I have dreams about storms quite regularly)
Dreaming of a storm represents disturbance. How you feel about the storm may indicate how you're responding or dealing with a disturbance in your waking life.
A storm is also a symbol of commotion. You might be feeling what is happening around you is out of control.
Also consider the storm as an outburst. It may represent an emotional flare up in your life that is quick to pass.
OR
To see a storm in your dream signifies overwhelming struggle, shock, devastating loss and catastrophe in personal affairs. It also represents unexpressed fears or emotions like anger, rage, turmoil etc. On a positive note, it may also mean the rising of spirit within


MURDER (i had a freaky dream in which i murdered a guy i didn't even know)
To dream that you killed someone forewarns that heavy stress may cause you to lose your temper and self-control.


DEATH (I've had seperate dreams of me, sam, my bro and my parents dying)
To dream that you have been killed suggests that your actions are disconnected from your emotions.
It may also represent a part of you or your life that you wish would leave you alone and stop creating a nuisance.

Death of a loved one suggests that you are lacking a certain aspect or quality the loved one embodies.



I couldn't find anything on BOULDERS FALLING FROM THE SKY, a dream which i've had quite a few times, or about HAIR IN FOOD. I dreamt that just once, but the whole thing was so disgusting i can't forget the dream. I stopped having falling dreams about a year ago (thankfully, they suck and symbolize insecurity or something). I also couldn't find anything on a FREAKY, HUGE, DULL SUN NEAR THE HORIZON.
My dreams are plain freaky.

Adi is an ass, Part 3

Ok, this the convo I mentioned in the last post.


11-08-08 14:33 Sam: Yer right though. I wouldn't have gone in even halfway without Prachi ...
14:55 Adi: Yea. Does she hate nature?
16:37 Adi: Nice to see you reply to my messages.
16:44 Sam: Ah sorry I was sleeping. No she doesn't.
16:47 Adi: If nature did that to me, i'd be furious. You know she was sitting on a chair, and her feet didn't touch the floor.
18:32 sam: I think Nature made up for that.
20:30 Adi: Maybe. But i'd still call it an unfair tradeoff.
20:45 sam: You rather be tall dark and handsome with vacuum inside?
20:49 Adi: You'd rather be as short as a cricket bat and look like a thousand volts of electricity are coursing through you?
20:54 sam: And be decently endowed with gray cells? Yes.
20:54 Adi: Wow. To each his own i suppose. Personally, i wouldn't want to be that far down the ugliness scale.
23:06 sam: Whoa! No way! You don't know what ugly means. You're hardly one to speak anyway.
23:08 Adi: And nor are you. In all truthfulness.
23:10 sam: Yeah, LoL. I'm not interested in being a model either.
23:12 Adi: Wise decision.
23:12 sam: What's depressing you so much these days though?
23:12 Adi: Nothing of your concern.
23:14 sam: Aha! So I got it right. Something IS depressing you. That's reassuring.
23:14 Adi: Yea something is. I never denied it. It's probably beneficial in the long run, but right now it's depressing. And not just to me.
23:16 Sam: Don't worry. It'll be beneficial in the long run. Just don't get it out on others.
23:17 Adi: That would be upto me. And i don't think you understood what i meant by beneficial.
23:18 sam: Maybe I don't. So?
23:18 Adi: So it wouldn't be wise to assume that you do.
23:22 sam: I didn't. I just copy pasted what you wrote.
23:23 Adi: You assumed you knew. By pasting what i wrote. So don't.
23:23 sam: I didn't assume. Anything. I just asked you not to take it out on others.
23:25 Adi: That was the other sentence. Maybe you should read that message.
23:30 sam: Whatever you say boss.
23:32 Adi: Sure.

Adi is an ass, part 2

Ok, so this sms convo started when adi smsed sam saying that prachi is as short as a cricket bat. So, i smsed him regarding the same.
Here it goes...


Me-As short as a cricket bat? You long as a hairy street light! You waxy ear-hole! you bhusa brained cow! you father of your neighbours dog!

A-you'd think i insulted you by what you said.

Me-What is your problem with her? She's such a sweet girl! I know ur jealous, but had hoti hai! Why have u been acting so weirdly?

A-Shut the f up prince ass. Or i might have to do stuff you'll presently come to regret.

(note- here, i get into the 'sympathetic, i-know-you-have-a-prob-and-i-pity-you' mood, cause i know it irritates him)
me-Oh come on, what IS your prob? Something is wrong. Temme. U've been acting weird. As compared to the usual weird.

A-And you're right. She's not as short as a cricket bat. She's shorter. Her secret mysterious boyfriend must have brain damage.

Me-so, there is something up. Tujhe kisi ne kuch bola kya?

A- there's a lot i'm not going to tell u

Me-Well DUH! But y r u venting ur anger on us? Its not lyk ur ttlly vela or a totl sucker,but u've been mean a lot of tyms 4 no rsn.Its even Not d funny mean. Y?

A-f off

me-You're being so mean n u're not sarcastic or funny nemore and behave like an idiot. Y?

A- i'm not sarcastic. I'm deadly serious.

me-Exactly. U used to be. And u used to b irritating, but fun to b around. Not boring or mean. Now you are. Y?

A- Enough. Leave. Me. Alone.

Me- answer me.

A- not in this lifetime.

Me- what is up with you?

A- Bye.

Adi is an ass

Yellow.
Here's a sms convo btw me n adi that took place this morning. I put it up cause it so damn funny....

10:40 adi- i am I'm exempted! Woohoo!

10:54 me- Relax. I already know that. Quite flaunting. Go drown yourself. And take ur phone with u or delete my pics.

10:56 a- Oh ya. Your pics. I forgot all about them. I'm gonna post them all over facebook by evening.

10:57 me- You're doing nothing of the kind. I know you're obsessed with me, but yeh to had ho gayi...

10:58 a- watch me

10:59 me- Won't. ur too bhayanak. I'll have nightmares tonight.

11:00 a- ok then. You can always see your pics.

11:02 me- Oh, i know i'm looking cute in them...

11:02 a- yea. Like my dog.

11:03 me- your dog looks like you, not me.

11:08 a-You've never seen my dog. If i didn't know better i'd say he was your twin. Same intelligence level too. All he does is fetch.

11:10 me-I haven't seen ur dog, but i've seen u. u look a lot like a dog. And i've heard ppl say that ur dog is more intelligent than u, and it taught u to fetch.

11:12 a-Yea. And i don't have a dog. So go clean out those centuries of wax. Half wit.

11:12 me- the NHS regrets to inform you that your birth was an accident. Please report to the nearest hospital to be put down. We apologize for any inconvenience.

11:15 me- yeah. And you can't even fetch. You're too dumb to be able to do even that.

11:17 a- Now that i come to think about it, my neighbour has a pug that looks exactly like you. Are you sure it's not your sibling or something? I mean, it would fit right in. No one would ever make out the difference. Ever.

11:18 me- i heard he's your son.

11:19 a- oh no. I don't believe in polygamy. He's really your sibling.

11:22 me- Don't try and disown that poor little son of yours!!
*horror* aaj kal ke ma-baap, zimmedari lete hi nahi...

11:24 a-I don't much want to adopt your sibling either. He's too much like you. Way ugly.

11:28 me-Come on... Don't say that about your real son. Kitna bhi ugly ho, hai to tumhara beta hi na. Must have got his good looks from you.

11:30 a-He's your sibling. I do NOT have the misfortune of being your father.

11:33 me-But you are fortunate to have a beautiful son like him who has the misfortune of resembling you. He needs you. Don't deny him.

11:35 a-No. He needs you. So he'l know he's not the ugliest person in the world. Then he has something to be grateful for.

11:38 me-Yup. He needs me to get his ugly father to accept him, and show him where he got his pretty face 4m, so he can sigh with relief-"atleast i'm not as bad as dad"

11:39 a- he's your sibling. I'm not your father 1+1=2

11:43 me-He's not my sibling. You're his father. 2+2=4

11:44 a-I'm sorry to break it to you, but he is your shaking. The resemblance is uncanny.

11:45 me-He is your shaking??? Go to hell. I'm not replying anymore.

11:46 a-Lol. Sibling. Haha. My ribs hurt from laughing so hard.

11:53 me-Dis is a telephone terrorst team.Wyl recievng dis mssg a virus wll b activatd. Dis virus shld hv infctd ur phone by now. ur phone wll b disabld,unlss u r ugly.

Survey

"Subohi",he said "you're arrogant, you know."
"huh?!? Kaise?"
"Jaise tu behave karti hai na, usse."

Thats it.
Such a small conversation. And it made me go crazy for a week. I went around asking people if i was arrogant or not.

Here's the result of the survey.
Ppl asked- lots
Ppl who answered in negative- almost all
Ppl who answered in positive- 2

Ok. So most answered in negative, either because they're too nice or i am.


The 2 ppl who answered in positive were-

Meghavarshini- yup, our darling tomboy.
She said "Jitna hona chahiye, utni hai. Its not like you won't talk to ppl and be stuck-up, but you also don't behave like a wimp." (this is in my words. She was speaking in Hindi and i forgot what exactly she said) "But you're not that arrogant. If you were, you wouldn't have been worrying about it now, or thinking about it."

Prachi- Our darling cute-but-damn-intelligent-little girl.
She said, "You are. And maybe its a good thing you are. You don't take any crap from anyone."


Well, i have to say that i'm flattered. I asked the guy what exactly i did to make him think i was arrogant. He has promised to tell me the next time i act arrogant.

And yeah, IF i am arrogant, hell yeah, i'm proud of it.



Faltu ka info-
our team name for interrobang (for which we qualified second, but didn't win) was My Foot, thought by who else, but your footness, Poison.
It was pretty dramatic, the announcement.
Ishan goes, "And the second team to qualify with 10 points is.... My Foot!"
and everyone looks around silently,wondering whats going on and what he means. No one claps.
We were silently high five-ing and getting up when someone finally spoke, realising that its a team name, "yeh kaun hai?"

Faltu ka info #2-
This ad on Hit 95 fm has me laughing everytime i hear it.
"What is your idea of a great time?" voice A asks
"A great time? Just give me a TIGER, and i'll have a TIGER TIME!"
then voice A informs you how "you too can have a TIGER TIME at any of these tiger parks!"
Yeehaw.

Aaj bahut ajeeb din hai.

Ok. Today is totally weird.
All of a sudden, ok, so maybe not THAT suddenly, in the AVH, this guy told me that this other guy has a crush on me.
Then, I go out of the AVH, my friend suddenly tells some other guy that she had a crush on him.
Both the things happened in the last perod today, and my reaction to both was "WHAT??!!"

For the first,cause it doesn't seem like the guy likes me(lets call him A). But then the guy who told me about it(lets call him B) seemed pretty sincere and wouldn't lie for no reason. And yeah, he told me "Jab dekho, to pata chalta hai."
Well......
Maybe that could be. Its pretty apparent to us girls when a another girl likes a guy, cause of the way she behaves, but the guys doon't get a clue. It could be the same for me.
Any ways, I've told B that I'll kill him if he was lying.

For the 2nd, I was surprised cause i thought she'll never tell him.


I'm shaken.

Haiku

I'm doing this vela post though i have better things to blog about, just because irritating adi is fun.

Here's some haiku on him (yes, i used a syllable counter).

I hate Aditya
Why does he like me so much??
He looks horrible

I love it. Its a masterpiece.

next:

Snow is nice panda
save pandas from predators
and from Aditya


And ya, whats the point of haiku anyways??
It doesn't rhyme, you have to count the stupid syllables and it sounds horrible.
Why did anyone invent it???
*sheesh*

I am a Kriminal

So, our school teachers suggested we read our almanac. Our CT actually gave us 15 min to read it. I was getting dead bored, so i decided to flip through it and surprsingly, i came upon a very interesting quiz called "Do the right thing, Say the right thing." I scored 21 out of 24 on it.

OK, OK, it isn't a quiz, its the list of rules which we SHOULDN'T break.
Wow. i scored 21/24!!!
I'm a criminal!!!

Here is the list.

1. Disfiguring or damaging school property. Untidy and unruly behaviour in class. - well, DUH i've broken this rule. I've scratched my name on tables, i swore at people and i've thrown pieces of paper on the floor. Ha!

2. Bunking classes and monday tests- you aren't a true dipsite if you haven't bunked.

3. Bunking school- Na, thats one i haven't done.

4. Sloganeering and signature campaigns.- I DID sign for the signature campaign for "SAVE THE TIGER". I dunno if its against the rules.

5. Bringing cell phones to school- come on, everyone who has a cell phone does.

6. Use of violence in any form- I've slapped jangu.

7. Scribbling or writing anything on shirts or uniform- Lemme think, i think i've scribbled "kick me" and "420" on lots of people's shirts. umm..yea, i have.

8. Using abusive language- Who the fuck said i've broken this one???

9. Not wearing the proper school uniform- yea, i've worn winter shirts during summer time, exchanged green for white shirts and even worn jeans.

10. assembling or going to PPC- I haven't ASSEMBLED, but i've gone there.

11. Bringing, wearing, buying, selling or possesing any kind of gament with slogans written on them- I've brought, worn, bought and possessed (still possess actualy,) them, but not sold.
*clicks tongue* no way that i'd do such a hideous thing.

12. Damaging, scribbling or tearing pages from library, text or exercise books- not library, but i've torn lotsa pages from my exercise books. i mean, who hasn't!!!

13. Brining sharp and injury causing articles such as knives, etc- i got my swiss army knife for 2 yrs till an asshole stole it.

14. Bringing books, CD's etc. not relevent to their course work- yada, yada, who the hell made this rule anyways????

15. Bringing costly articles (like expensive watches, cameras, fountain pens , i pods)- FOUNTAIN PENS????? are u kidding me???

16. Bullying or using any from of violence against a fellow student- refer to rule #6
17. Smoking, gambling, drinking or using drugs- No Way.

18. Possession of crackers or bursting crackers in school -Na, i'm a good girl.

19. Throwing of colour on one another within or near the school premises- I've dropped ink on someone.

20. Bringing more than Rs. 30/- for canteen purposes- Rs 30/- does NOT feed 20-30 hungry teens yelling for a treat on your birthday.

21. a) Entering school without uniform even after school hours- think class assembly.
b) Bringing civil clothes at any point of time- read rule # 21 a)

22. Late arrival in classes- everyday matter.

23. Late arrival in school- happened a few times.

24. Misconduct, indiscipline and misbehaviour in school transport- huh???



How much do you score??? Anyone who beats me gets a treat!!!
And yeah, who the hell made these stupid rules????

Dumb things I thought and did when i was a kid

All of us,thought and did stupid things when we were kids. Here's a list of mine. No criticism allowed.


#1 I believed that Indians got indipendence by beating the crap otta the British and killin' 'em all. No idea where i got the idea from- But i freaked out one day, when i discovered that Brits lived in England. I concluded that other Indians didin't know about it, cause if they did, they'd have killed the rest of the Brits too. Ad yeah, i DID want them to.


#2 I got into a hbit of asking my mom everyday, "dopahar ho rahi hai kya???/ is it afternoon????" I simply couldn't understand what timeof the day was "dopahar"/ afternoon.
Morning was the time you woke up. Evening was when the sun went down. Night was when you slept.
When the hell was afternoon?!?!?!


#3 A lot of planes pass over my house during th night. When we first shifted here, i thought that they were sounds made by dinosaurs who lived in the nearby park.


#4 I also believed for a long time that it became day and night because somebody changed the scene aroundour house, just like they do in plays.


#5 I thought the moon followed me.


#6 I was once very fascinated by how sometimes, it became sunny and shady abruptly. I didn't understand that it was just because clouds passed in front of the sun.
I once asked a senior in school (she was in 5th, i was in 3rd). She smiled and shook her head importantly, "tumhe badi classes mein pata chalega!!"


#7 I tried to smuggle a stray puppy into the house.
My parents (duh) found out (duh) and sent it back (duh).


#8 I thought my brother was an ass. I was wrong. My brother is brainless. Asses have brain (I mean the donkey vala ass, you pervert!!!)

Something cute and deep

"Real isn't how you're made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."
"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.
"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real, you don't mind being hurt."
"Does it happen all at once, like beng wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"
"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real,most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things won't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

~from THE VELVETEEN RABBIT by Margery Williams

Searching

I've been having a couple of pretty similar dreams.


The last time I had similar dreams was 2-3 yrs ago when i kept dreaming about falling from high bulidings. They stopped a long time ago. Now i know that they symbolize insecurity, but i dunno what the dreams i'm having now mean.


I've been dreaming about searching.
And not finding.

I've had 3 till now.

In the first one, i was searching for this guy in a party.I was in a club or something and searching for that guy on the dance floor. I desperately tried to find him, prodding everyone in the crowd to ask. I was still searching, when a phone began to ring. i realised it was my phone and i hoped it was the guy calling. then i woke up to see that my phone was ringing in reality.


In the second one, i was in the library, apparenty in school, because i was worrying about the period ending, but it didn't look at all like our school library. I was searching for a book. I kept searching. And searching. And searching. I was running around everywhere, trying to find it. But then the bell rang and i woke up.


In the third one, i was in a metro station with my parents. We were waiting for a train. There, i was searchingfor tis type of chocolate/biscuit sorta thingy in the bakery there. I kept searching through these trays and trays of assorted pastries and things, trying to find it. I couldn't before the train came and i had to go.


Why the hell am i searching for things!?!??!
Why don't i get them!?!??!

*sob*

Stupid Things Said

"Please provide the date of your death."
-from an IRS letter


"I was under medication when I made the decision to burn the tapes."
-Richard (Dicky) Nixon


We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"
-Lee Iacocca


A verbal contract is not worth the paper it's written on."
-Samuel Goldwyn


We understand the importance of having bondage between parents and their children. Dan Quayle


"The people in the Navy look on motherhood as being compatible with being a woman."
-Rear Admiral James R. Hogg


"If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life." -Brooke Shields


"A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."


As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error. - Weisert


"We apologize for the error in last week's paper
in which we stated that Mr. Arnold Dogbody was a defective in the police force. We meant, of course, that Mr. Dogbody is a detective in the police farce."
-Correction notice in the Ely Standard, a British newspaper


"Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly."
-Batman costume warning label


"The private enterprise system indicates that some people have higher incomes than others."
-Gerry Brown


"I have opinions of my own --strong opinions-- but I don't always agree with them."
-George Bush


"I was provided with addtional input that was radically different from the truth. I assisted in furthering that version."
-Colonel Oliver North, from his Iran-Contra testimony


"We are sorry to announce that Mr. Albert Brown has been quite unwell, owing to his recent death, and is taking a short holiday to recover."
-Parish Magazine


"We are not without accomplishment. We have managed to distribute poverty equally."
-Nguyen Co Thatch, Vietnamese foreign minister


"The word 'genius' isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
-Joe Theisman, quarterback and sports analyst


"Fiction writing is great, you can make up almost anything."
-Ivana Trump, on finishing her first novel


"I've read about foreign policy and studied, I now know the number of continents."
-George Wallace, 1968 presidential campaign


"We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply exclude certain types of people."
-Colonel Gerald Wellman, ROTC instructor


If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very low crime rate.
-- Marion Barry, mayor of Washington, D.C.

Irony

We got free batteries with our DVD player remote a few months back. They're of some strange company.
They're the first batteries i've seen who've 'leak-proof' written on them.
Ironically, they're also the first i've seen leaking.

Irritayting, once more.

I was in the bathroom. The house was empty. Mom had gone to the market. The maid had left a while ago.
And i, i was wet and soapy, and in the middle of my bath, when the phone rang.

Ring...
I thought about ignoring it. The person could call later.

Ring...
But what if it was one of my friends? I couldn't talk to them while i'm soaped up, but i could ask them to call later. Na, they'll call later themselves.

Ring....
What if its mom. She won't call unless its important. Maybe, i should get the phone. No, she'll call again later even if i don't.

Ring....
What if dad's calling? He's in mumbai. If he's calling, its bound to be important. But then again, he'll understand...

Ring...
SHIT.
What if its my grandpa? My smallest 4yr old cousin is sick in hospital. What if something has happened to him?!?!
That thought made me bolt. I grabbed a towel and jumped outta the bathroom.

COUSIN!!!! WAIT! I'm coming!!!


The phone had been ringing too long... What if grandpa cut the phone?

I ran and picked it up.
"hello?" i said fearfully.
Wait, what the hell am i saying? I should ask if he's ok. If he's alive. If he's serious. If he's out of hospital or not.

"hello madam?? Blahblahblahblah...."

huh? I drifted off as grandpa kept on blabbing, ignoring his words. Grandpa called me madam? Wait, that's not my grandpa!

"wait,what?"
"madam, do you want an insurance?"

Amazing. Fantastic. I ran from the bathroom for insurance.
Cool. What the *$@# ?!?!


"No thanks" now keep the bloody phone please.
"But ma'am.... Listen to the whole scheme..."

Thats it. That did it.

" You really enjoy calling people and torturing them, don't you? " i said in a sickly sweet voice.
"ma'am?"
"you're selling insurance, aren't you?"
"yes"
"GOOD! Get yourself one, cause the next time you call, i will personally hunt you down and kill you!" i snapped and slammed the phone.


Boy! That felt good! He deserved it after dragging me out of my bath. It made up for all the times these horrible insurance and credit care people called and tortured us.
Maybe it was mean, he was just doing his job, but it felt good. Damn good.
I hate these advertising people. They get your number from somewhere and make it a point to torture you by calling at the most inappropriate times.
Losers.

Happy

Happy.
Its a nice word. I like it.
I like it the same way i like the words chamgadad (bat in hindi) and obnoxious.
They sound nice to say, the way they roll off your tongue.


So what makes you happy?

Does a direct jump from 70% in pre-boards to 91% in boards make you happy?
In my case it doesn't. As yet, i'm not sure why.


So, what does make you happy?

Some will think me crazy reading the things listed here. The dumbest things can make me happy, somethings that are worthless to others.

Like rain. And a cloudy sky.
I'm a sucker for rain. A bit of drizzle makes my day.
And i love cloudy days. They're lazy, not too bright, not too dark. Also, you never can guess what time is it, on cloudy days. It might as well be evening, though its afternoon.
I like that feeling of time-less-ness.


Then, i like stuffed toys. The fluffy and cuddly ones. They just make you wanna hug them.


Nice soft songs that you can sing along with, songs that remind you of things, especially songs that you used to like, but haven't heard for a while make me happy.
Listening to them, the world seems... I dunno, perfect?


And yeah, my parents and friends make me happy. Just seeing my mom smile at me everyday in the morning makes me happy.


Long endless drives to nowhere at night make me happy. Delhi is beautiful at night. Especially on windy days.


And yeah, obviously, wind makes me happy. Strong, chilly gusts of wind.




Thats about it. I'm sorry, but gadgets, marks, t.v. serials, food and other worthless,pain-in-the-ass, materialistic things don't (stuffed toys are NOT materialistic thingies).

The things i've listed above, i THINK they make me happy. Cause i don't think the feeling they cause could be described as anything else.

That feeling of completeness. Like life couldn't be better. As if there's nothing more you need. Actually, sometimes, there isn't.

Dunno.... THE CBSE 10TH RESULT

Marks-

English.. 92
Maths.. 94
Science.. 90
French.. 80
Sst.. 94
IT.. 96

total % - 91


Am i happy? I dunno.
No, its not because of the 'Nerd's Excuse' that "I should have got more....*weep* "
Na, its more than i expected. My parents are overjoyed. And i am.... Dunno.
I'm not happy like ppl should be, going crazy, yelling, with grins on their faces.

Is it because i don't care?
No, i do care. But.... Dunno.

I'll Carry You Home

"Trouble is her only friend and he's back again.
Makes her body older than it really is
She says its high time she went away
no ones got much to say in this town.
trouble is the only way is down.
down. down.
As strong as you were,
tender you go...
i'm watching you breathing for the last time.
a song for your heart.
but when it is quiet,
i know what it means and i'll carry you home.
i'll carry you home.

if she had wings, she'd fly away
and another day, god will give her some.
trouble is the only way is down.
down. down.
as strong as you were, tender you go...
i'm watching you breathing for the last time.
a song for your heart, but when it is quiet,
i know what it means and i'll carry you home.
i'll carry you home.

and they were all born pretty in new york city tonight.
and someones little girl was taken from the world tonight.
under the stars and stripes.

as strong as you were, tender you go.
i'm watching you breathing for the last time.
a song for your heart.
but when it is quiet.
i know what it means and i'll carry you home.
i'll carry you home."

This song is by James Blunt. Its called Carry You Home.
I saw its video on VH1, and it really touched me. I actually cried the first time i saw it. I dunno why. It just made me feel very sad.
But it also made me think. In the video, James is shown carrying the dead soldier's few possessions to his girlfriend/wife, though he's singing that he'll carry HIM home.
Not that it doesn't make sense. It does. It makes more sense than i imagined it would.
Its true, after we're dead, we just become memories. The things we owned and were associated with us, sort of become us, cause they carry the memories. For the people who love us,those things are a reminder of who we were.
You can go watch the video on YouTube.


Cool. My mom got me a pichka-ring, and is probably wishing she didn't cause i keep squirting everyone in the face, including her. I wonder if it'll remind her of me someday.
Hmmm.....

poem

Do you decide
where you are going?
Or like me,
you let yourself
be dragged away by somebody?

Do you face
whatever happens?
Or like me,
you lie hidden
behind lies, for eternity?

Do you cry
when you feel like it?
Or like me,
you hold it in
to escape mockery?

Do you smile
in your sleep?
Or like me,
you try waking
to forget what you see?

Do you delight
in what you did?
Or like me,
you wish it hadn't
gone so badly?

Like me,
do you sleep,
when you wish to wake?
do you laugh,
when you wish to weep?
do you wander,
though you know the way?
do you embrace,
those you wish to murder?

Do you do
what you want?
Or like myself,
don't realise,
the only one stopping me,
is me.

Do you enjoy
all that life brings?
Or like me,
you crawl through it,
though you were born with Fire Wings.

Of nails, swearing and sudden trips

Of nails- I'd been growing my nails for a month and they'd grown very long. No one failed to notice them, though they evoked different reactions in different people, like delight ("oh! They're looking nice..."), disgust ("they're soooo long."), inspiration ("i'm going to grow mine too!"), jealousy ("my nails don't seem to grow at all."), exasperation ("i've told you a dozen times, CUT YOUR NAILS!",that, was my mom), and horror (people sitting next to me while playing Contact were afraid i'd slice their fingers off....).
So- i finally cut my nails last week. (Punya- "what??? You cut them??? You call this cutting??? You can kill someone with those!")
and it turned out to be a good thing that i did, because on wed, i banged one of my nails into the hard, metal back of the bus seat and yelled so loudly that half the bus turned to look.
If they'd been any longer, i swear they'd have snapped into two.
Ouch.


Of swearing- i've started to swear a lot there days ("what the....."fill in the blanks with any appropriate 4 letter word.). God forgive my sins.


Of sudden trips- firstly, i'd like to tell everyone that jahangir and adi are......something that if i wrote here would get me banned from blogger.
A week ago, i had given my name as an "avid reader" from my class, and that was a good thing as on wednesday, the lovely library department people suddenly told up to assemble in the library for a trip to the american library.
Going there was fun. I, sam, prachi, and prerna occupied the last seat while adi, jangu and punya sat on the second last one, and HELL, are they IRRITATING or what?!?!? They completely ate my head with their perverted jokes.
On reaching the center, we were immediately supplied with cookies, appie fizz, and a weird mango-orange combo juice. We attempted to look mannered and dignified as we put on a oh-i-don't-usually-eat-tons-of-free-cookies look, as we helped ourselves.
Then, we were given a lecture on studying in the US, after which we say a bum-oriented documentary about Air Force 1, the US prez's plane. Wondering what i mean by bum-oriented? Well, the documentary had more shots of peoples backsides's than of their faces.
The movie would have been boring if it hadn't been for my and sam's funny commentary which got us choking with laughter and earned us many strange looks. When we came out, we were in one of our hysterical-humorous moods, when we would start laughing at the drop of the..... forget hat, even a pin would do the job.
Unfortunately, we had to look around the extremely-boring-dripping-of-heroism-and-amazing-ness-of-the-US library. Needless to say, i kept giggling for no reason and got scolded by our darling teachers.
The trip back sucked.
A few guys came and occupied the last seat, so i used my head and slipped into the second-last seat. Adi and Punya sat beside me and jangu was left seatless. He and Prerna disappeared somewhere,while sam and prachi sat with the guys, behind us.
I felt like killing adi (i still do now, but not as badly as i wanted to then.....) because he kept pushing punya on top of me and i couldn't sit properly. And his sick jokes didn't make him anymore bearable.
When we got back, the last period had begun, so i bunked it with a couple of more people. We sat around on A block, first floor, watching some 8thies practice a dance sequence for their assembly.
There, i saw written on a wall, "guys are the bigest losers", and some one had written "you bet!". On impulse, i wrote "i agree", and signed. Four more people signed. You can go and sign too, if you want.


And yes, i'm doing this (look below...) only cause rudy hates it.
LIST OF PEOPLE WHO WENT WITH US ON THE TRIP
Me, sam, prachi, mini, prerna, prerna, avantika, sonal, punya, jangu, adi, amrita, isha, vinayak, rudrath, shreya, a weird guy whose name i dunno, naman, divyanshu, anuj, and other people who i know, and more others who i dunno.

Memory

I hate not being able to remember things.
No, i don't have memory loss, its just that i can't recall things.
For eg. I tortured myself for 6 months trying to remember a song of which i remembered just one line- "i just want u to know who i am." i didn't remember anything before or after the line. Not even the tune. I finally found the song on my bros laptop and my soul rested. I'd actually heard that song around 2 yrs ago for the last time....
Then, i was haunted by the line "you love me, but you don't know who i am." i found out the name of the song on the radio.
Nowadays, i can't remember what i'd been thinking about a minute ago. I get lost thinking about something, and when i wake up, i forget about it.
And yes, another line whose song i can't remember- "you can touch, you can play, you can say i'm always yours."
Please help me. Which song is it from?

Devil's Dictionary- B

Here's the second part of my favourites from Devil's Dictionary-


Bacchus- a convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk. (guys? remember this one from last year?)

Backbite- to speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.

Battle- a method of untying with the teeth of a political knot that wouldn't yield to the tongue.

Beauty- a power with which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

Befriend- to make an ingrate.

Behavior- conduct, as determined not by principle, but by breeding.

Bigot- one who 's obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you don't entertain.

Birth- the first and direst of all disasters. As to the nature of it, there appears to be no uniformity.
Castor and Pollox (whoever they were) were born from the egg. Pallas came out of a skull. Galatea as once a block of stone. Leucumedun was the son of a cavern in Mount Aena, and i myself have seen a man come out of a wine cellar.

Body-snatcher- a robber of grave worms. One who supplies the young physician with that with which the old physician supplies the undertaker. The hyena.

Bore- a person who talks when you wish him to listen.

Bottle nosed- having a nose created in the image of its maker.

Brandy- a cordial composed of one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody murder, one part death-hell-and-the-grave and four parts clarified satan.

Bride- a woman with fine prospect of happiness behind her.

Brute- see HUSBAND.

Devil's Dictionary- A

I read a book called The Devil's Dictionary. Its one of the very-amusingly-saying-the-truth books. These are my favourites from 'A'. The rest will soon follow-

Abnormal- not conforming to standard. In matters of thought and conduct, to be independent is to be abnormal, to be abnormal is to be detested.

Aborigines- persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber;
they fertilize.

Abrupt- sudden, without ceremony. Like the arrival of the cannon-shot and the departure of the soldier whose interests are most affected by it.

Absurdity- a statement or a belief manifestly inconsistent with ones own belief.

Accuse- to affirm anothers guilt or unworth, most commonly as a justification of ourselves having wronged him.

Acquaintance- a person we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. A degree of friendship called slight gen object is poor or obscure but intimate when object is rich or famous.

Adder- a species of snake. So called for its habit of adding funeral outlays to other expenses of living.

Admiration- our polite recognition of anothers resemblance to ourselves.

Affliction- an acclimatizing process preparing the soul for another and bitter world.

African- a nigger who votes our way.

Ambidextrous- able to pick with equal skill, a right hand or a left hand pocket.

Ambition- an overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.

Apologize- to lay the foundation for a future offence.

Auctioneer- the man who proclaims with a hammer that he has picked a pocket with his tongue.

The Slaves Of The Cells

Cell phones and their owners are hard to seperate. Like me and my cell.
I was actually suprised when i realised how much i depend on it.
I make calls with it.... And sms too, of course....
I listen to songs on it.
I use it to make quick notes and write down imp stuff, when i don't have a pen, and even when i do....
I take pics with it...
I blog with it...
I google with it...
I check my mail on it...
I surf the web on it (this happens more rarely than the 3 things above, which cannot b included in 'surfing the web' according to me)
I download and read e-books on it...
I play games on it...

Its like the ultimate handy dream machine. And things are going to just get better.
Ppl are getting very dependent on their cells.
And yeah... I almost forgot to mention what inspired me to write this post...
Even my maid has a cell now. I was in my room, when i heard a strange ringtone which certainly wasn't mine and i was wondering what was up... and then i heard my maid going 'hello, haan? Chinto theek hai na?'

The Future etc.

Do u want to know your future?
I don't. And i find those people dumb who want to.
Earlier, when I was a kid, I did wish I could've known the future to prevent mistakes and probs from arising later in life.
Now, I've lost that wish. I think I was dumb to wish that.
Its pathetic. I think the future is governed by your actions now. So if you think before you act, your future will be great.
And even if we suppose that the future is already decided and our life depends on fate, I really don't want to know. It'd take all the fun out of life, to know what will happen.
And for that reason, I even hate all those rashi / number / tare / tarot future-telling shows on the news channels. They don't have any news, so all of them have hired a pundit/tarot lady each to tell ur future 5 times a day.
And people actually watch that.
And even call in.
"Meri shadi kab hogi?" Man, find some other aim in life than to get married or to call pundit ji.
"Mera promotion kab hoga?" When you start working hard rather than calling in like a vela on this show.

Idiots.

Then these ppl even give upayes to get a better future, like,
"raat ko, suraj dhalne ke baad, neem ke ped ke neeche beth kar Gita pado" (wtf???)
or "ketu ko majbut karne ke liye kutte ko shanivar ke din roti aur mithai khilaen"

You can try the above amazing remedies if you want.

Hey Shadab Bhai,
Happy B'day in advance. I suppose everything is fine with u, but u better study hard(er).
I'm in 11th now. Classes started last week. I took science, with bio. Damn, its been a long time since I even talked to u. The boards went well and the results will be out on 27 may. I didn't do a lot, actually, I didn't do anything in the holidays after the boards... I just sat around and watched movies. And yeah, I finally convinced mum n dad to get the DVD player. We got it a few days after the boards.

Everything is k, except that I'm in a class full of NERDS. They study ALL THE TIME. Before the teacher comes, and after the teacher goes, they study all the time. They're crazy. Thankfully, we'll b reshuffled in july.
Also, I'll b coming on TV. I n sam participated in this show for NDTV metronation. You basically were given a topic, camera and 2 days to make a vid. Our topic was Yamuna. Pretty horrible topic, but filming the whole thing was fun.
We even used their cam to make vela vids of us, pretending to b reporters reporting how the country was being terrorized by ppl (most prob. Taliban) who were stealing "bain-per ke jute" (shoes of the right foot)... K, I kno its dumb, but it was very funny too. I'm going to ask those ppl to give us the whole vid, even the things that were edited out (like the taliban vid) on a CD.

So, tell me whats up with u? Tell me abt ur plans for ur b'day too.
And yes, STUDY. I kno u sleep a lot and sleep late. Try studying.

E-mail me quick.

Chao
A, ur sis (duh!)

OMG. OMG.

OMG. I read in the paper that 8% of tampon users in Tamil Nadu are men. I wondered about what the hell they do with it.
Here's a list of what they apparently buy it for, which i googled-

1) To hold hemmaroid suppositories (what the hell does that mean?)

2) They can get toxic shock syndum (whatever that is)

3) Make tampon crafts (to bring menstrual joy to the holidays and fun to daily life) like-
a) string of tampon lights
b) tampon blowguns
c) tampon bandoliers to hold ammo for your gun
d) tampon toupees for receding hairlines
e) tampon cufflinks and neckties

4) Stuff it up your butt (what the hell for? I have no idea)

5) If you like to dress up or behave like women, then.......
Whateva I think its all very disgusting.

ALL PRAISE THE IDIOTS!!!

Announcing the enterprising demises of the 2007 Darwin Award Winners

" Named in honor of Charles Darwin, the father of evolution, the Darwin Awards commemorate those who improve our gene pool by accidentally removing themselves from it. "
This was the year of the Squashed Darwin Award Winner. THREE independent groups of people attempted to remove the supports from beneath a barn, a water tower, and a heavy factory roof. In all cases, the structures collapsed without their aptly-named supports. Duh! This year brought us 16 jaw-droppping nominees, not counting new nominees for previous years and Near Misses (AKA Honorable Mentions) which I will cover in the next ish.
Enjoy the stories of the winners... and be glad you're not one!

RUNNER UP # FIVE:THE LAPTOP STILL WORKS (Confirmed True by Darwin)
"Driving is not a time to be practicing your multitasking skills," remarked CHP spokesman Tom Marshall, commenting on a 29-year-old computer tutor's decision to drive along Highway 99 in California while working on his laptop. He drifted over the center line, and was killed by oncoming traffic. CHP officers found Oscar's computer still running, plugged into the Honda Accord's cigarette lighter.
--------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+
RUNNER UP # FOUR:SUPERIOR MOMENTUM (Confirmed True by Darwin)
June 2007, Illinois Two Valparaiso men tested their reflexes by playing "chicken" with a train. Which man could stay on the rail the longest in the path of an oncoming train? At the stroke of midnight, the contest was decided. The winner, aptly named Patrick Stiff, lost his life. The train continued on, as the conductor was unaware that it had hit anyone.
--------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+
RUNNER UP # THREE:BARN DEMOLITION (Unconfirmed by Darwin)
January 2007, West Virginia) Three friends set out to dismantle a dilapidated barn one bracing winter afternoon. Speaking of bracing... One industrious man fired up his chainsaw and ripped through a crucial support post. Carrying the weight of a full barn roof, those wooden support beams were all that stood between the demolition worker and structural collapse. It was all fun and games until the roof, sans support, succumbed to the pull of gravity and flattened the man with the chainsaw. As a consolation prize, the deceased was indeed successful at demolishing the barn.
(Darwin notes, this story is unconfirmed, but no disputes have come to my attention, as usually happens with bogus stories.)

Addendum: This was the year of the Squashed Darwin Award Winner. Two other groups of people attempted to remove the supports from beneath a water tower, and a heavy factory roof. In both cases, the structure collapsed without their aptly-named supports. Duh!

--------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+
RUNNER UP # TWO:MOLE HUNT (Confirmed True by Darwin)
January 2007, East Germany One man's extraordinary effort to eradicate a mole from his property resulted in a victory for the mole. The metal rods he pounded into the ground and connected to a high-voltage power line, electrified the very ground the man stood upon. He was found dead at his holiday property on the Baltic Sea. Police had to trip the main circuit breaker before venturing onto the property.

--------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+
RUNNER UP # ONE:WHAT GOES UP MUST COME DOWN (Confirmed Double Darwin Award)
June 2007, South Carolina A passing cabbie found a 21 year-old deceased couple laying naked in the road an hour before sunrise. Authorities were baffled. There were no witnesses, no trace of clothing, and no wrecked vehicles present. But investigators eventually found a clue high on the roof of a nearby building: two sets of neatly folded clothes. Safe sex takes on a whole new meaning when you are perched on the edge of a pyramid-shaped metal roof. "It appears as if [they] accidentally fell off the roof," Sgt. McCants said.

--------------------------------------------+---+-+---+-+-+-+-+
AND THE 2007 DARWIN AWARD WINNER IS...THE ENEMA WITHIN (Confirmed True by Darwin)
May 2004, Texas Michael was an alcoholic. And not an ordinary alcoholic, but an alcoholic who liked to take his liquor... well, rectally. His wife said he was "addicted to enemas" and often used alcohol in this manner. The result was the same: inebriation. And tonight, Michael was in for one hell of a party.
Two 1.5 litre bottles of sherry, more than 100 fluid ounces, right up the old address!
When the rest of us have had enough, we either stop drinking or pass out. When Michael had had enough (and subsequently passed out) the alcohol remaining in his rectal cavity continued to be absorbed. The next morning, Michael was dead.
The 58-year-old did a pretty good job of embalming himself. Toxicology reports measured his blood alcohol level as 0.47%.
In order to qualify for a Darwin Award, a person must remove himself from the gene pool via an "astounding misapplication of judgment." Three litres of sherry up the butt can only be described as astounding. Unsurprisingly, his neighbors said they were surprised to learn of the incident.

Check out the site at: http://www.darwinawards.com/

Ok. I just a minute ago saw this recently released ad by Airtel and Nokia. It shows people from different places,situations and occupations clutching at their hearts when they hear the 'teen teen' of a call (apparently) ,as if it brings some dreadful news. In the end they show SRK who dutifully clutches his chest and declares - (not quoting) 'jab Airtel aur Nokia ka mel ho, to garv se bolo...' - and they show the dozen different people saying 'hello!'. Well I usually do not post perverted things, but I dunno why, I suddenly wondered why there weren't any women in the ad, as they were showing different people, what was this? Discrimination?
When I imagined how it'd look if they were there.... Well never mind........

Yeah!

PPP won! But I'm surprised there wasn't any poll rigging. I mean, why did Musharaff let the polls be fair and all?
Hmmm....
Whatever, it's about time that he left. I don't suppose he could have handled any of the things going on around north of Pakistan. Maybe PPP would do better getting rid of the terrorists. Ok, they may not, but they'll certainly be more inclined to do it, since their own leader was killed that way.
But why am I happy? I don't live there, do I? No, but I am hopeful, like majority of Pakistanis that the new PPP-PML(N) government would do well. And make Pakistan a proper democracy, and live up to the peoples hopes.
It"s going to be all joy and celebration for a while, a nice change, I think, from all the violent and depressing occurrences.
I've actually been thinking of a e-pal of mine (who I haven't seen online for years). I wonder how he is. He lived in Islamabad, and wanted to be...Something. I forgot. I told him I wanted to be a pilot, and he said why? To bomb Pakistan? And he said something, I don't remember, but I think it was army or politics or something, cause I said, why? To declare war against India? He also had a small sister and I convinced her once to speak to me in 'Urdu'. Most people don't realise that common Urdu and Hindi are quite same. I told her that and i actually enjoyed talking to her in Hindi. I had mailed him once, when the earthquake had struck in Pakistan and north India. I was suprised to see, that though he lived in Islamabad, very near the epicenter, he and his comp was fine, as he was sitting online a day later. I find this quite suspicious.
Anyway, I wonder what he thinks of all the things going on now. Most people don't realise it, but we're like, witnessing history. For eg. i didn't care too much about the killings in Nepal a few years ago. And now, we're reading about it in our civics book. I was actually suprised to see that.

And yeah, why did PPP win? Well, it's obvious, that the people were hoping it would do better, and they sympathise with Benazir's family etc etc... And surprisingly, Bilawal seems to have a hand in it too, as young girls who think him 'hot', and are above voting age, went and voted for his party. But I'm content that he's not leading the party as yet. It's kind of monarchic, you know, mother dies, son inherits. He'd do well to lead later, when he's finished studying, and the other leaders are old.
And yes, a piece of advice for Mr. Bilawal, DO NOT MARRY A PAKISTANI GIRL. Nah, I'm not against them, but he'd do better to marry a Indian Muslim girl. It'd be so wonderful, a Pakistani leader unites India-Pakistan again, they become better friends than they ever were. Yeah! Cheers! Ok, Mr. Bilawal, you may not want to do it, but you must find a nice, popular, young Pakistani leader who would. It's for the nations! They should marry on the Wagah border.
*sniff* how lovely.
Hmmm... I'm blabbing too much today, hai na?

Boards Shoards

Boards are coming,yeah, Boards are coming,yeah. And you know what? Surprisingly enough, I'm not tense at all, while SOME people are crying and banging their heads with tension.
I dunno why I'm not worried. Lots of people stay up till 3 am and them wake up at 7, to study again. I can't do that, ever! I hate compromising with sleep and I don't ever before an exam, as in, quickly go through the main points and every thing. I've found that it actually confuses me more than anything. I take extra care to sleep on time the night before an exam, and The Hindustan Times agrees with me. Quoting them, darlings -

"Inadequate rest impairs growth and learning and school students need seven to eight hours of sleep a day. Sacrificing sleep time studying is wasted as what is read is not retained. It's only when the brain is well rested that you can retain better."

I also remember reading an article ages ago about an experiment. Here, people were to remember simple patterns of placing cups or something. Like, the blue one comes first, red second, etc. The people who'd slept well remembered the pattern most correctly while the second group,who'd not slept, made more mistakes. It seems that the brain adjusts and arranges info acquired while we're asleep.
After reading that article, I'd made it a point to study facts or things that I found very confusing, in the night, before I went to sleep. Maybe its my imagination, but I those facts correctly now, without any confusion.
Good for me that I'm not worried. My friend's friend says that someone in her school hanged herself. She was a tenthie and an idiot. How can you suicide for marks?
I don't get it. Life's AMAZING. How can you give it up for marks? OK, it may not be amazing to her, but that means that she should try to make it better, not die!
Yeah, maybe it's about aiming. My aim is to study, while enjoying at times too. She probably aimed for more than she could manage, thus overloading.
No one can stand failure, thus the stupid act to ignore your 'failure'. Its all in the mind.
Why take tension? I think its very idiotic. Though it can fuel your will to work harder, too much is er.... not good.

Places to go

Here are some visit-able places that you've probably never even heard of. Well,delhi is full of monuments,and you can't expect each of them to get the same attention can you?

ASOLA WILDLIFE SANCTUARY
Its close to tughlaq fort.
Its almost within city limits. If you want to go in,you should pay for a guide,its worth it. You'll find black bucks here(yeah,the same "protected" species that salman shot), nilgai, jackals, and deer.

AGRASEN KI BAOLI
It lies off hailey road,near connaught place.
Its a thousand-year old stepwell. It has 3 floors and is said to be haunted.

PATAUDI PALACE
Pataudi in Haryana
Nice place,green and everything, good place to spend a few hours relaxing. Built by Nawab Ibrahim Ali Khan,its home to the cricketer, Tiger Pataudi. Its 60 km from delhi.

Yes,all this info has been nicked off magazines.
A comment by my friend when i told her about all this- "Kya baat karti hai? A sanctuary in delhi? How come they spared it? I predict- apartments and malls to be seen there soon..."
Very likely to come true.

Holy Shit

Ok. I suppose everyone knows about the book by Dan Brown, Da Vinci Code. Do you remember the reference to a picture called Madonna Of The Rocks/Virgin Of The Rocks (VOTR)? This para is from a book i was reading- Secrets Of The Code.The para is an excerpt from a para by Lynn Picknett

here it goes-
"...We should take a look at one of his other religious paintings, VOTR ... The following revelation is so sensational, so apparently ludicrous, as to appear the product of a Freudian delusion, or an infantile fantasy. Yet it should be remembered that Leo (da vinci) was primarily a hoaxer, a joker and illusionist- and that he hated the holy family ... clive and i wrote in the Templar Revelation that Leo was subtle in presenting his secret heretical code "for those with to see" and did nothing that was "the equivalent of sticking a red nose on st peter." But as we discovered more recently, we were wrong.
Do not think of the reverential hush of the great art galleries ... Think more of giggling school boys passing naughty scribblings behind the bike sheds ... A clue lies in the title of the painting- "rocks" was italian slang for testicles, ... Equivalent of the modern term-balls. And so it is that the reason for the mass of rocks above the holy family becomes shockingly obvious.
Almost growing out of the Virgin's head are two huge male "rocks"- topped with a massive phallus that rises to the very skyline,comprising no less than half the painting. The offending article is created out of a mass of rock, yet it is clearly discernible, and is even impudently topped with a small spurt of weeds. ... This is Leo the hoaxer and the heretic at his most audacious- and vicious. He created the grotesque make appurtenances deliberately, no doubt perversely and savagely inspired by the organisation commissioned by him ... With a giant penis growing out of her head, he is clearly saying "to those with eyes to see " that this is no Virgin.

Here are some visit-able places that you've probably never even heard of. Well,delhi is full of monuments,and you can't expect each of them to get the same attention can you?

Some Kidney Freak

Aren't there times when you just want to kick someone hard in the ass? I want to. I want to kick that stupid doctor, Dr Amit Kumar.
Yes, the kidney guy.
He is so immensely besharam.
He gets caught, but instead of going nicely and quietly ("yes, i know i made a big mistake. I should pay for it, i agree. Lets go to jail."), he tries to actually bribe the nice police people! ("yes, i know i made a big mistake. I should pay for it, i agree. Here, i'll pay YOU! I think you don't get paid nicely enough. Here, here, take it. Bacchon ke liye mithai-vithai kharidna!).
And then, back in delhi, at the airport, he was smiling so nicely for the media. Hello? You are a criminal darling, not SRK with his bodyguard.
And the media is busy doing weird stuff. Instead of telling about his crimes, they tell us that his house hard kidney-shaped pools. Tch tch. Kidney obsessed, isn't he?
And they're also very busy naming him- Kidney Kumar, Dr kidney, Dr khaufnak, Kidney Kingpin and Khooni Kumar. My favourites are Dr. Dracula and Kidney Chor. The latter gives of visions of him diving at people and emerging with a kidney, to scuttle away at full speed.
And his looks are best described by my mom- "bilkul hevan jaisa lagta hai!"

Good vs Evil

I installed a new facebook app, Good vs Evil, around a month ago. Just 1 person has voted as yet, and he voted me 100% evil. Well, the guy is a big weirdo, but i do agree i'm quite evil, and i'm not at all offended by his saying so. There's nothing wrong with being a bit evil, not in a way as to hurt someone emotionally or physically, but by being naughty. Also, i don't think being mean to the people who dislike you is wrong. Its not great to be good always, because-
#1 If it weren't for evil-ness, i don't suppose we'd appreciate goodness as much as we do. Also, that much niceness would make of gag. Imagine he there was always light, and on darkness at all, them you'd probably wish for a bit darkness, wouldn't you? Oh yeah, this brings of to...
#2 Too much sweetness is BORING. I'd certainly want a change. Somehow, in the quiz about what kind of guy you'd fall for, i got "sweet guy".
Ewwww...
I gave the quiz again, changed 1 answer, and got "the frat boy". Hmmm... Definitely my style. Come on, isn't the guy who plays Draco loved because of his evil grin? He is SO adorable.
I don't mind being a bit evil, but i suppose others do, and take it far too seriously. Take Anuj for example. I had a hard time convincing my parents to let of in to sam's house on the last pre-board, and we were trying to watch a movie in the little time we had. Then, anuj pops up. He bores me to death and tries to show up very pathetically boring clips, thus, wasting our movie-watching time. Should i act courteous? Well, i didn't. I called him a kamina. I didn't mean to hurt his feelings or anything, but to tell him that he's annoying. Sorry anuj, but you are irritating. Not that i'm not. I actually take pleasure in saying things that exasperate others and make them feel like banging their head on the wall.
So, the point is,don't be good always, or evil to the people who are nice to you, but he someone makes fun of you and you don't reply cause you're a goody-two-shoes, you'd be better off retaliating. And make sure neither side wins in the battle of good vs evil.

The suicidal tendencies of a hollow-horned, ruminant, quadruped mammal.

We'd once gone to my dad's friend's house, and that's when uncle told up about this goat he'd got for bakra-id. He'd got a nice, white goat, and decided to keep it on the terrace. The goat was well-fed, happy, and full of goatly-goodness.
On id, when uncle went to fetch the goat, he couldn't find it! They found a while later lying atop a car parked on the ground floor. The goat had apparently jumped to its death.
My dad says- Stupid animal... How much did it cost?
Bro says- maybe it decided to suicide and become shaheed, rather than surrender to the butcher.
Me- hahahahaha...
Such was the story of the real shaheed bakri (remember that chapter?).

Please don't forget me

You know,i've been thinking,all of us have our own different stories of our life, different thoughts, we all respond differently to things,people and songs. Everyone is unique and has a different story of things we've done. Only we and some of our family and friends know about it.
Now, imagine, that everyone forgot everything about you. Your friends,family,everyone you know, doesn't remember you or anything you did. Not even at the back of their heads. Wouldn't you sort of be dead? Because you didn't make a difference in anyones life,didn't leave an imprint that you existed. All you did,your story is lost. There's no evidence you existed.
Or maybe, what if you really died. Everyone you knew,who loved you, with whom you shared your life, died, and noone remembered you anymore. If you made a difference only in a small group of peoples lives. You were forgotten and all the beautiful things you'd seen and experienced and felt were forgotten. Evidence you existed, your clothes, your letters that you wrote, your diary,in which you recorded your thoughts and everything that happened to you, were destroyed. Th things you did,the relationships you created were of no importance,cause everyone important to you was dead. You were lost,your memory lost, no effect made by you remained, no sign that you existed remained, and your memory had faded away, your ideas and dreams disappeared along with you, how'd you feel? I don't know why, i find the whole idea very frightening.

About the blog…. And what not to write in an exam.

Oh yeah people…about the blog…no, it’s not like I decided to abandon it or anything, but, I didn’t have the time to update it. Ok, maybe I did, but I didn’t have the heart to use my spare time writing a blog than playing games or watching movies.
How selfish of me.
Ah, but this doesn’t mean that you stop visiting my blog. Visit it regularly, and you may occasionally find a new post.
I was busy earlier with my pre-boards, and later, with enjoying the holidays after them, but I’m busier now, now that we’ve got our papers. I don’t suppose anyone need be told how horrible they were and how my parents are after me now to study harder, etc….how….not interesting.
Anyway, as you all know, I have amazing style, creativity, flair, (…blah, blah, blah,…) and imagination. So, I usually try to show my creative aptitude in my language papers. I’ll give you a very recent example:

Q. As a concerned citizen, you welcome the decision of the planning commission for a sharp increase in allocation for education, (…blah, blah, blah…). Write a letter to the editor sharing your views.
Now, we have a nice letter to write on our hands, and I don’t use my creativity? Nah…impossible. Here’s how it went (I’m serious):

156, My House Road
Wherever You Wish, 110099

76 January 2008

The Editor,
The Times Of India,
16, Their Building road
Wherever They Wish, 110099

Sir
Subject: Planning commission’s decision
This letter is regarding your article,” Allocation for education. Teachers rejoice as salaries increase” was excellent.(….blah, blah. Totally serious, to get marks, you kow…)
Yours faithfully,
Crystal Das Khan

Hohoho. Ok, I know it wasn’t funny, but most people don’t have the guts to do that, AND get a “good” in it (yeah!!!).
Well, adding a little humor to the language you know, is ok, but to the language you don’t know?? Don’t try it, kids, its harmful to your health (you see, you write dumb stuff, marks get cut, you get horrible marks, you get upset, parent see marks, parents get high BP, parents go to hospital, you under stress….so, bad for health)
Here’s what happened when I wrote totally idiotic stuff in my French paper:
Q. Write a message to your granma that you can’t come visit her this week-end cause ________ (make a shoddy excuse).
I wrote the whole message beautifully, but in the end I signed off:

Ta grand-fille,
Rakshas

NOT A GOOD IDEA. I didn’t know how to sign off. You can’t write “amicalement” can you? I wrote what I thought was for grand daughter and added a pretty little ah-so-humorous name, Rakshas. Now, I firstly signed off on the right, not left (damn), and grand-fille means nothing (double damn).
Teacher says: IS THIS WHAT YOU’VE LEARNT?
Ooops. I can’t believe she smiled as she gave me the paper.
I would love to go on rambling, but I gotto go study. Nooo….my mom isn’t standing behind me and prodding me in the back to go study. I’m going cause I want to, cause I like it, and I know that studying is better than writing blogs,and cause I love French, and chemistry too…as much I love ….. (whew!!! she’s gone.) HARRY POTTER

Wishes

Wishes for 2008 (may all this happen!)

1) More nice movies like Taare Zameen Par. The movie was very cute. It makes you laugh, makes you cry, and leaves you feeling good at the end of it. And the songs were too good. 'Meri Ma' makes you cry, and the title track has some very good lyrics. Can't stop humming it.

2) Real news - ok, I know I've written entries already criticizing the stupidness of news channels, but we seriously need some real news. Look at Aaj Tak. It started two almost similar news channels - Dilli Aaj Tak and Tez. Dilli passes its time sending its reporters around Delhi to show where to shop in Delhi (as if we don't know). Now, what is Tez to do? It shows clips of weird things going on around the world (like, off from 'world's most amazing videos'), or clips from reality shows (zoom in to Rakhi Sawant's cleavage, give her publicity, etc). But they crossed the limit recently. I was flipping through channels (I know, ne pas zapper, but still ...) and paused at Tez. There was a guy in their studio who looked like he hadn't bathed for a week, sitting and singing a song I'd never heard in a damn besura voice. I was just wondering what the hell this was about,when he abruptly stopped singing, raised his hand to his nose, and pinched it close. He them took a deep breath through his mouth, relaxed, and then began to open and pinch close his nostrils rapidly as to produce a nosy tune of the song he had been singing. When he stopped, I was choking with laughter, but the reporter calmly smiled and congratulated him on his 'kala'. Sheesh. News channels ke itne bure din aa gaye?

3) Old design - I really want the notebooks with the old designs back. The new ones by Janta Book Depot must be cheaper for the school, I suppose, for they do look like it. I hate the horrible green cover with black flecks. It looks diseased. I want the nice Tushar Publications notebooks back.

4) Ba dies - I'm not a horrible person that I want someone dead, and neither is Ba a vamp that she should die, but it's time she died. 'Kyunki Saas bhi...' has completed around a million episodes and Ba's grand children now have grand children, but that lady is still alive and kicking. I'm sorry Ba, but its time to go.

5) Pakistan ki gatha - I wish Pakistan turns into a nice democracy with true elections sans anymore bloodshed and its people live happily without fear. Mein kitmi mahan hoon. Meri jai ho!
Oh yeah, also, when Pakistan elects its PM, he/she will come to meet me personally cause thanks to my dua, he/she was elected.

6) Ed board - I become the main editor of the Ed Board. Atleast I'll ensure it won't suck as much as this year's did.

7) Whatever -whatever plans I have for this year may actually take place and not remain just plans.

8) Travel - I hope I travel abroad yet again. And due to Pre-Boards, I didn't even get to travel anywhere this winter.

9) Claire - I know this is very mean of me, but I hope a really cute guy comes instead of my host, Claire this year. A nice, sweet, shy and cute guy. Ok, I'll stop dreaming. French and cute and not my hosts boyfriend? Nah. Impossible.

10) Packaging dream - I know this won't happen, but I wish the Lays and other companies would use less plastic in packing their meagre amount of chips. How many times have you just opened a bag of chips and still had to reach really deep inside to get to them? And they're polluting the environment too, those assholes.

11) Etc - I wish for world peace, etc etc

What are your wishes this new year? SMS your wishes to 9877777777. Type 'wishes' your wish and win amazing prizes! (yeah right, you will...)

2007 Ki Jai

2007 is gone. I'm sad that it has, but you really can't hold on to anything for long, can you? I have to agree that it was an amazing year,and maybe more memorable than the last few.
When the year began, I really was expecting a lot from it. Firstly, because it's the last year with section F and also because I believe 7 is lucky for me. You all must have read in the newspaper how 9 occurred again and again in Benazir's life. It's similar for me. I'll tell you the gatha in another post.

This year was simply amazing. We got Lakshmi ma'am as our class teacher, and though we hated her sometimes, we loved her too, and couldn't deny that she taught us a lot. Then, the French exchange trip was too good. I was a bit baffled at first by the speed with which the people spoke French, but began to enjoy it too. I was lucky to have my host in Cognac (yeah! Cognac!), as I got to see Cognac, as well as Angouleme and Paris. Paris was pretty, but quite small, and the Eiffel tower was huge! There weren't cute guys in France at all, unlike what Meha had predicted (well, except for my host's boyfriend. Damn.). I also discovered (even though I expected it) that the French thought us, like, VERY backward, expected we slept on the floor and gasped in surprise when they found us using the Net or Hotmail. It was also hilarious sometimes, like when Vidisha's host turned out to be lesbian and when Utkarsh showed us the video of the theme park he went to, where the background of a kids' ride had pictures of nude girls. (Read all posts in May)

I sadly had to miss our assembly,which I can guess from descriptions, was horrible. Because -
a) very few were allowed to participate and
b) Sambhav was apparently selecting the songs (sheesh.)
c) etc.

Then, I also loved the time spent at my grandma's place with my cousins in the summer holidays, though it was a bit cramped in the 4-bedroom house. Everyone in the immediate family was staying there and it was one of the most wonderful times I spent with my family. Everyone was so caring and loving. Out of the 9 cousins, I'm the middle one, 4 older, 4 younger. It made me feel good inside to see how everyone cared about me. I wasn't left out of anything. I went with the adults to the hospital, I played with the little kids, I went shopping with the older kids, but, it would have been nice if we all hadn't met because my aunt was sick. We all used to laugh and smile around her, make plans how we'd go for a whole family trip to Shimla or some place, when she got well. She didn't. God bless her soul. (Read post She)

I had to work hard to catch up with work after the holidays and man, was it tough!
Since then, till now, I've been discovering work I haven't done and was supposed to do in the holidays.

My aunt died soon after the assessments, and my reaction to the news wasn't unlike the one I had on hearing that Benazir had died. I went "Huh? What? Are you serious?" It's a pity she left with dreams in her eyes of getting well, going for family trips and of one day showing me her home in Lucknow. I haven't been there yet. I don't think I want to go.

Then, I fell in love again. No, not that way... I fell in love with life. I don't know why I felt so happy and thankful for everything. This happened exactly after the half-yearly's. There was Saturday after the last test and Id on sunday. I spent the next few days visiting places around Delhi where I hadn't been before, and suddenly felt very thankful for being here, where I am. I realized that life couldn't get better than this. Well, it would be good enough if people stopped wanting more. That time, there was nothing I wanted and felt happy just looking around at the things I have. I kept smiling without a reason, being nice to the worst of people and was sooo happy for around one month till when it began to wear off a bit. I mean, seriously, we're so lucky! I go to Asia's best school, am born in the world's most culturally diverse country and live in the capital! Delhi is amazing, extravagant, diverse and I'm some of the lucky ones who live in Delhi, but not on the road. I was thankful to my great-great grandfathers for not going to Pakistan and to my parents for coming to Delhi. I have a father who is ready to blow a couple of lakhs so I can see the world. My mom is so lenient with me, (unlike other Muslim mothers who want their kids in burqas) and allows me to wear anything except the sleazy dresses. I have a loving brother, who only recently turned into a preacher, (after going to college). I don't know about you, but I love my country of a million different views, of billions of ideas, of thousands of languages, of a crore examples of hope and faith, of the everyday exercise of democracy and freedom, of people with the strength to stand up for their rights, of the many accommodated cultures, and I'm proud of my country who is willing to change without losing its roots from the past. Here is a country willing to keep you no matter which religion or caste you belong to. I've never not been accepted or made fun of because I'm a Muslim in a country where majority of people are Hindus. This general acceptance isn't found in all countries. And I really love my life because of all that.

Thanks a lot 2007, thanks a lot.
And oh yeah, Adi is still an ass. Time won't change my view about him.