Happy

Happy.
Its a nice word. I like it.
I like it the same way i like the words chamgadad (bat in hindi) and obnoxious.
They sound nice to say, the way they roll off your tongue.


So what makes you happy?

Does a direct jump from 70% in pre-boards to 91% in boards make you happy?
In my case it doesn't. As yet, i'm not sure why.


So, what does make you happy?

Some will think me crazy reading the things listed here. The dumbest things can make me happy, somethings that are worthless to others.

Like rain. And a cloudy sky.
I'm a sucker for rain. A bit of drizzle makes my day.
And i love cloudy days. They're lazy, not too bright, not too dark. Also, you never can guess what time is it, on cloudy days. It might as well be evening, though its afternoon.
I like that feeling of time-less-ness.


Then, i like stuffed toys. The fluffy and cuddly ones. They just make you wanna hug them.


Nice soft songs that you can sing along with, songs that remind you of things, especially songs that you used to like, but haven't heard for a while make me happy.
Listening to them, the world seems... I dunno, perfect?


And yeah, my parents and friends make me happy. Just seeing my mom smile at me everyday in the morning makes me happy.


Long endless drives to nowhere at night make me happy. Delhi is beautiful at night. Especially on windy days.


And yeah, obviously, wind makes me happy. Strong, chilly gusts of wind.




Thats about it. I'm sorry, but gadgets, marks, t.v. serials, food and other worthless,pain-in-the-ass, materialistic things don't (stuffed toys are NOT materialistic thingies).

The things i've listed above, i THINK they make me happy. Cause i don't think the feeling they cause could be described as anything else.

That feeling of completeness. Like life couldn't be better. As if there's nothing more you need. Actually, sometimes, there isn't.

Dunno.... THE CBSE 10TH RESULT

Marks-

English.. 92
Maths.. 94
Science.. 90
French.. 80
Sst.. 94
IT.. 96

total % - 91


Am i happy? I dunno.
No, its not because of the 'Nerd's Excuse' that "I should have got more....*weep* "
Na, its more than i expected. My parents are overjoyed. And i am.... Dunno.
I'm not happy like ppl should be, going crazy, yelling, with grins on their faces.

Is it because i don't care?
No, i do care. But.... Dunno.

I'll Carry You Home

"Trouble is her only friend and he's back again.
Makes her body older than it really is
She says its high time she went away
no ones got much to say in this town.
trouble is the only way is down.
down. down.
As strong as you were,
tender you go...
i'm watching you breathing for the last time.
a song for your heart.
but when it is quiet,
i know what it means and i'll carry you home.
i'll carry you home.

if she had wings, she'd fly away
and another day, god will give her some.
trouble is the only way is down.
down. down.
as strong as you were, tender you go...
i'm watching you breathing for the last time.
a song for your heart, but when it is quiet,
i know what it means and i'll carry you home.
i'll carry you home.

and they were all born pretty in new york city tonight.
and someones little girl was taken from the world tonight.
under the stars and stripes.

as strong as you were, tender you go.
i'm watching you breathing for the last time.
a song for your heart.
but when it is quiet.
i know what it means and i'll carry you home.
i'll carry you home."

This song is by James Blunt. Its called Carry You Home.
I saw its video on VH1, and it really touched me. I actually cried the first time i saw it. I dunno why. It just made me feel very sad.
But it also made me think. In the video, James is shown carrying the dead soldier's few possessions to his girlfriend/wife, though he's singing that he'll carry HIM home.
Not that it doesn't make sense. It does. It makes more sense than i imagined it would.
Its true, after we're dead, we just become memories. The things we owned and were associated with us, sort of become us, cause they carry the memories. For the people who love us,those things are a reminder of who we were.
You can go watch the video on YouTube.


Cool. My mom got me a pichka-ring, and is probably wishing she didn't cause i keep squirting everyone in the face, including her. I wonder if it'll remind her of me someday.
Hmmm.....

poem

Do you decide
where you are going?
Or like me,
you let yourself
be dragged away by somebody?

Do you face
whatever happens?
Or like me,
you lie hidden
behind lies, for eternity?

Do you cry
when you feel like it?
Or like me,
you hold it in
to escape mockery?

Do you smile
in your sleep?
Or like me,
you try waking
to forget what you see?

Do you delight
in what you did?
Or like me,
you wish it hadn't
gone so badly?

Like me,
do you sleep,
when you wish to wake?
do you laugh,
when you wish to weep?
do you wander,
though you know the way?
do you embrace,
those you wish to murder?

Do you do
what you want?
Or like myself,
don't realise,
the only one stopping me,
is me.

Do you enjoy
all that life brings?
Or like me,
you crawl through it,
though you were born with Fire Wings.

Of nails, swearing and sudden trips

Of nails- I'd been growing my nails for a month and they'd grown very long. No one failed to notice them, though they evoked different reactions in different people, like delight ("oh! They're looking nice..."), disgust ("they're soooo long."), inspiration ("i'm going to grow mine too!"), jealousy ("my nails don't seem to grow at all."), exasperation ("i've told you a dozen times, CUT YOUR NAILS!",that, was my mom), and horror (people sitting next to me while playing Contact were afraid i'd slice their fingers off....).
So- i finally cut my nails last week. (Punya- "what??? You cut them??? You call this cutting??? You can kill someone with those!")
and it turned out to be a good thing that i did, because on wed, i banged one of my nails into the hard, metal back of the bus seat and yelled so loudly that half the bus turned to look.
If they'd been any longer, i swear they'd have snapped into two.
Ouch.


Of swearing- i've started to swear a lot there days ("what the....."fill in the blanks with any appropriate 4 letter word.). God forgive my sins.


Of sudden trips- firstly, i'd like to tell everyone that jahangir and adi are......something that if i wrote here would get me banned from blogger.
A week ago, i had given my name as an "avid reader" from my class, and that was a good thing as on wednesday, the lovely library department people suddenly told up to assemble in the library for a trip to the american library.
Going there was fun. I, sam, prachi, and prerna occupied the last seat while adi, jangu and punya sat on the second last one, and HELL, are they IRRITATING or what?!?!? They completely ate my head with their perverted jokes.
On reaching the center, we were immediately supplied with cookies, appie fizz, and a weird mango-orange combo juice. We attempted to look mannered and dignified as we put on a oh-i-don't-usually-eat-tons-of-free-cookies look, as we helped ourselves.
Then, we were given a lecture on studying in the US, after which we say a bum-oriented documentary about Air Force 1, the US prez's plane. Wondering what i mean by bum-oriented? Well, the documentary had more shots of peoples backsides's than of their faces.
The movie would have been boring if it hadn't been for my and sam's funny commentary which got us choking with laughter and earned us many strange looks. When we came out, we were in one of our hysterical-humorous moods, when we would start laughing at the drop of the..... forget hat, even a pin would do the job.
Unfortunately, we had to look around the extremely-boring-dripping-of-heroism-and-amazing-ness-of-the-US library. Needless to say, i kept giggling for no reason and got scolded by our darling teachers.
The trip back sucked.
A few guys came and occupied the last seat, so i used my head and slipped into the second-last seat. Adi and Punya sat beside me and jangu was left seatless. He and Prerna disappeared somewhere,while sam and prachi sat with the guys, behind us.
I felt like killing adi (i still do now, but not as badly as i wanted to then.....) because he kept pushing punya on top of me and i couldn't sit properly. And his sick jokes didn't make him anymore bearable.
When we got back, the last period had begun, so i bunked it with a couple of more people. We sat around on A block, first floor, watching some 8thies practice a dance sequence for their assembly.
There, i saw written on a wall, "guys are the bigest losers", and some one had written "you bet!". On impulse, i wrote "i agree", and signed. Four more people signed. You can go and sign too, if you want.


And yes, i'm doing this (look below...) only cause rudy hates it.
LIST OF PEOPLE WHO WENT WITH US ON THE TRIP
Me, sam, prachi, mini, prerna, prerna, avantika, sonal, punya, jangu, adi, amrita, isha, vinayak, rudrath, shreya, a weird guy whose name i dunno, naman, divyanshu, anuj, and other people who i know, and more others who i dunno.

Memory

I hate not being able to remember things.
No, i don't have memory loss, its just that i can't recall things.
For eg. I tortured myself for 6 months trying to remember a song of which i remembered just one line- "i just want u to know who i am." i didn't remember anything before or after the line. Not even the tune. I finally found the song on my bros laptop and my soul rested. I'd actually heard that song around 2 yrs ago for the last time....
Then, i was haunted by the line "you love me, but you don't know who i am." i found out the name of the song on the radio.
Nowadays, i can't remember what i'd been thinking about a minute ago. I get lost thinking about something, and when i wake up, i forget about it.
And yes, another line whose song i can't remember- "you can touch, you can play, you can say i'm always yours."
Please help me. Which song is it from?

Devil's Dictionary- B

Here's the second part of my favourites from Devil's Dictionary-


Bacchus- a convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk. (guys? remember this one from last year?)

Backbite- to speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.

Battle- a method of untying with the teeth of a political knot that wouldn't yield to the tongue.

Beauty- a power with which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

Befriend- to make an ingrate.

Behavior- conduct, as determined not by principle, but by breeding.

Bigot- one who 's obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you don't entertain.

Birth- the first and direst of all disasters. As to the nature of it, there appears to be no uniformity.
Castor and Pollox (whoever they were) were born from the egg. Pallas came out of a skull. Galatea as once a block of stone. Leucumedun was the son of a cavern in Mount Aena, and i myself have seen a man come out of a wine cellar.

Body-snatcher- a robber of grave worms. One who supplies the young physician with that with which the old physician supplies the undertaker. The hyena.

Bore- a person who talks when you wish him to listen.

Bottle nosed- having a nose created in the image of its maker.

Brandy- a cordial composed of one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody murder, one part death-hell-and-the-grave and four parts clarified satan.

Bride- a woman with fine prospect of happiness behind her.

Brute- see HUSBAND.