I usually don't know what to write.
There's no use writing about the past. Firstly because it is gone and secondly, writing about things in the past years will take, well, years.
There's no use writing about the future because I don't know what lies there.
And I don’t know what about the present is worth writing.
It's strange, when you actually sit and think about it, that life is quite meaningless until someone gives you us an aim or something affects us in such a way that we get an aim. Mostly it’s because of our parents. Every parent, even beggars' just wants their kids to be successful. It might change in terms of perspective. To one, success may mean money. To another, fame. For me, it's to be famous. I want to be famous for my writing. It's not that I write well, it's just the ideas. I have awesome ideas, but I just can't put them down properly on paper. I can’t write, I admit it.
People say my vocabulary is good but, sometimes I think it’s inadequate to express the stuff I feel.
For example, a few days ago, we had gone for a picnic to
Whatever, it was so pretty, something so picturesque, I was so unhappy I didn’t get my camera.
I and my friend Espera went exploring the place. That’s why I like her (sometimes). Unlike other people, she doesn’t sit around and is ready to break the rules. Well, not exactly, whatever, little adventurous. I tried to climb a wall around the tomb but stopped because I was afraid it was a thin wall and that I’d fall and also it was a bit high.
Later we saw that it wasn’t that thin but had a steep drop on the other side. We found an iron gate which was locked with a chain.
We kicked it and tried to open it because there were stairs behind it leading to a part if the terrace. But we found another stairway leading to another part of the terrace.
*** Sorry, I just went to see what my mom was doing. She was watching Kyunki Saas Bhi Bahu Thi. I hate those serials. I don’t know what horrible things Ekta Kappor has seen as to have come up with such concoctions in which every person has married at least 5 times and got plastic surgeries done dozens of times. ***
So we went to the terrace and sat on the wall with one leg hanging off. Surprisingly I wasn’t afraid of falling off. It was nice, the trees, the tomb, reminding you, hinting at you of something about the past and the wind … I wanted to fly, and I’m serious. I feel awesome when it’s cloudy, the mind is cool and it’s blowing fast. It blows against you or brushes past you and you just want to fly away with it. I was on the seventh heaven when I went paragliding. But I was wearing a full-sleeved shirt and trousers so I didn’t feel the wind but it was fun.
Then, I somehow dragged Espera down to go exploring more. She thought we’d seen it all, but there was more than meets the eye. We crossed the bridge to go to this fortress thing. You had to climb up the stairs to reach the gate. It was surrounded by a wall. In the corners of the wall, we saw a small passage leading to a circular area which had 3 windows but was open to air like everything else.
It was small but so awesome. The sun was up and part of the circular wall was casting a shadow inside the area. Espera sat at the window and it seemed a perfect location for a photograph. We were listening to the iPod, looking lost, immersed, the area, partly shadowed, partly in light, symbolizing the good and the bad sides of stuff, the window behind us showing a path with pretty bushes alongside it, full of flowers. And of course, the wall itself reminding you of an essence gone, of forgotten things. It would have looked timeless in black and white. But I find it so weird; people have memories attached to the strangest o places. A bus stop. A bus stop to us may have been important to someone else. If I’d have to be something, in my next life, I’d be a place where tourists go a lot. Then I’d be loved more than hated and so many people would have memories attached to me.
*** Ok, I saw something really weird on TV. A monkey has been carrying a puppy along with him. He sleeps with it on a tree and takes care of it. It’s weird. ***
Later, we decided to see what the rest of the class was up to. We just saw that some girls were playing lock-key. But I dragged Espera away, horrified when I saw this girl, running in a weird fashion, shrieking like mad with her hair open and skirt billowing. Espera just burst out laughing. When we came back near the end, they were playing a game of truth and dare and the girl seemed to have regained her sanity and was sitting nicely. One guy got a dare to pole dance. He selected a tree which was really thin and had a few branches only near the top, so was something like a pole only. At first, he stood uncertainly, clutching the tree trunk, looking around to see if anyone else from any other class was watching. Then, suddenly, without warning, swung around the tree and it started to bend a little under his weight, wrapped his legs for a second around the trunk then quickly got off. It was a six-second performance but had me laughing for hours.
